The Diceman Cometh

Well, on Saturday I went out in the 12 degree night to see Andrew Dice Clay. It’s been a long time since he was the hottest comedian in America, but I still dig the guy. Nobody knows how to harass an audience like Dice, and he’s so non-PC and filthy that he’s bound to say something to offend just about anyone. For some reason, I really dig that.

So I got the worse seats in the house. Second to last row up in the balcony. When Dice comes on, I can see the top of his head, and he looks an awful lot like Larry Fine with muscles and a leather jacket. In a way, that’s kind of sad. But once he goes up to the mic, pops a cigarette into his mouth (he doesn’t light it up, but he doesn’t need to, we all know its a prop that’s part of the persona) and says “Test, test” into it, it’s clear that the man hasn’t changed.

Even with a cold, he kicked lots of comedic ass with that angry wit of his. When people laughed at the “Test, test” start, he raked them over the coals for being “stupid fucks who who laugh at anything.” He then focused on a couple of audience members in the front row, which was hilarious as he tormented them. His act had me laughing out loud a lot. A routine he did about how people today would rather text each other than fuck was pretty hilarious. And he did some pretty funny stuff about the Clintons and Obama.

Not everything was funny. When you’re as all-around offensive as Dice, some of the stuff is going to rub anyone the wrong way. But that’s the price you pay. And the man delivers.

I know a lot of people hate Dice. But I’ve always dug him, partly because he’s so hated. And at the end, when he did the dirty nursery rhymes we’ve heard a million times (and therefore are maybe the weakest part of his act – even though there is a kinda nostalgia to them), after saying that he really doesn’t like to do them anymore (of course, the audience insisted, and he gave in), I was almost transported back to the days when he was big.

I haven’t laughed this much in a long time. And even though my seat sucked and the audience was full of yahoos who kept yelliing “Oh!” (actually, the audience around me wasn’t that bad), I had a really good time.

He was worth going out in the cold for.

I’m glad.


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